I finally found my brother, just in time to make memories
Six years ago, Jess Basey-Fisher learned a life-changing secret from her father, Nicholas, while holding her mother's ashes. Nicholas revealed that Jess's mother, Ann, had a baby boy before she met him and had given the child up for adoption. This news shocked Jess, but it also sparked a strong desire in her to find her long-lost brother. Jess, a nurse living in Carleton St Peter, Norfolk, had very little information to start her search. She only knew that her mother had met the baby's father at a dance at a US airbase in Sculthorpe, Norfolk, and that Ann had been sent to London to give birth. Using these clues, Jess began her search online. She spent hours on the Ancestry website, looking through birth records from a 15-year period. She guessed that her mother might have named the baby James, and her guess turned out to be correct. Her father supported her search, but sadly, he passed away a few months after sharing the secret.
With the help of a social worker, Jess managed to find her brother on Facebook in 2021. He was now named Alistair Dalgliesh. The social worker sent Alistair a message, and he replied with his email address, but then there was no further contact. Jess worried that maybe Alistair did not want to be found or perhaps did not even know he was adopted. Despite her concerns, Jess decided to try again in October, reaching out through social workers. This time, Alistair responded, and they began to talk. Jess was overjoyed to discover that her brother lived in Australia. In a surprising twist, Alistair's adoptive mother was a nurse and his father was a doctor, just like Jess's parents. Alistair had been adopted because his parents were struggling to have another child. Later, they had another son, and the family moved from Kent to Australia when Alistair was three years old.
Jess and Alistair arranged a FaceTime call and talked for two hours. They laughed about how much they looked alike and shared stories about their lives. Jess noticed that Alistair had many of the same mannerisms as their mother, and they both shared a love for music and history. Alistair, now 62, said he was happy to be found and had always wondered about his birth family. He had known he was adopted since he was ten years old. Jess was nervous about telling him that their mother had died, but Alistair took the news well. He wished he could have told his birth mother that he had a wonderful life. Jess also shared that her parents got married on Alistair's birthday, which made him feel special. Jess visited Alistair and his wife Suzie in Australia in April, but soon after, Alistair told her he had been diagnosed with stage four lung cancer. Jess stayed with him for five weeks to support him during chemotherapy. Alistair's family welcomed Jess warmly, and now Alistair plans to visit Jess in Norfolk. Jess wishes she had known her brother for longer, but she is grateful for the time they have together and is determined to make the most of it.
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"Jess wishes she had known her brother longer, but she is happy they can make memories now."
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